Pretty is as Pretty does

As a mom I often tell my children, “You are so pretty!” or “What a handsome boy I have!” I believe a parent is largely responsibility for shaping their child’s self-esteem, carefully molding it and building into something positive and wholesome.

Besides, have you met my children? They are pretty darn cute, large red cast and all.

I am often quick to add to these compliments a bit of reality, telling Miss E. and Isaac that what really makes one pretty or handsome is their heart and how they treat others. My mom used to say to me “Pretty is as pretty does“, meaning that one’s pretty looks can quickly be tainted by one’s less-than-stellar attitude.

The other day I was fixing E’s hair, which is usually a bit of bonding time and a bit of fighting time for the two of us. (Along with my “Pretty is as pretty does” quote that I toss around during such times, I usually throw out a “My-children-don’t-go-out-looking-like-stringy-ragamuffins-so-stand-still-while-I-fix-your-hair”.  And you thought we were all sunshine and smiles here at casa de phillips, huh?). After I had finished straightening and pulling her hair back, I spun her around to take a good look at my work. I said the normal thing any mother says when she looks at her baby girl, which was something like “You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen!” and planted a huge kiss on her nose.

I followed up my maternal gushing with the question of, “But what really makes us pretty, Miss E?”

I was hoping to hear her little three year old voice say, “A good attitude.”

Instead she looked me in the eye, smiled really big and said with a large amount of confidence, “A big bow!”

At least she understands the power of a good accessory.

Tagged as: building child's confidence